Actually, I'm not fine… blog

Part 5:

There was a time when I believed healing wasn’t meant for me. That my story was too heavy, my wounds too deep, my heart too scarred to ever feel whole again. I believed love would always be fleeting or conditional. Something you had to chase, something that slipped away the moment you reached for it.

But I was wrong.

Healing came in ways I didn’t expect. It came through my child, who forced me to see myself more honestly than I ever had before. It came through the cracks that revealed where the pain was still hiding. And it came through my partner, who stepped into my life not to fix me, not to erase the past, but to walk beside me through it.

He has carried what I thought was unbearable. He has shown me that love can hold weight, that love can sit in the darkness without fear, that love can breathe life back into places that felt dead.

I look at my child now, and I see hope. Not perfection. Not a life free from pain. But resilience. A future being built on something steadier than what I grew up with.
And I look at myself, and for the first time, I see more than survival. I see growth. I see strength. I see the possibility of joy that is real, not imagined.

To anyone who feels broken beyond repair, who believes love will never be safe or healing or true, I need you to hear this. There is still hope. There are still people who will meet you where you are, who will love you without conditions, who will help carry what you cannot carry alone.

I once lost that hope. But I found it again. And if I could find it, so can you.