Actually, I'm not fine… blog

Category: mental-health

  • The Hidden Battlefield… Series Part 5

    Part 5: Music, Rituals, and Small Lifelines Trigger Warning (18+): This post touches on mental health struggles, self-harm, and suicidal thoughts. Intended for adult readers. If you are in immediate danger, call your local emergency number now. When the big things are breaking, the small things sometimes keep you afloat.For me, it was songs. It…

  • The Hidden Battlefield… Series Part 3

    Part 3: The Body and the Mirror Trigger Warning (18+): This post discusses body image struggles, disordered eating, and self-harm. If you are in crisis, please seek immediate help (resources at the bottom). The body was never just a body for me: it was a battlefield. Everywhere I looked, there were rules for how I…

  • The Hidden Battlefield… Series Part 2

    Part 2: When Defense Becomes the Problem Trigger Warning (18+): This post discusses bullying, physical and emotional abuse, and difficult family dynamics. If you’re in crisis, please seek immediate help (resources at the bottom). There’s a cruel twist to being hurt: when you finally push back, the world sometimes calls you the problem. As a…

  • The Hidden Battlefield… Series Part 1

    Part 1: The Weight of Silence, into the depth. Trigger warning / Age advisory (18+):
This post contains descriptions of childhood and teenage abuse, self-harm, and suicidal thoughts. It is intended for adult readers (18+). If you or someone you know is in immediate danger, please call your local emergency number now. If you are in…

  • The Weight We Carry… Series- Part 10

    Part 10: There is no them vs. us After reflecting on my past, my upbringing, my relationships, and the lessons I now try to pass on to my child, one truth becomes clear: there is no “versus.” There is no war between men and women, no competition between genders, no hierarchy of struggle. There is…

  • The Weight We Carry… Series – Part 9

    Part 9: Raising a Child in a World of Broken Lessons Parenting is both a privilege and a responsibility, but it’s also a mirror. When you look at your child, you see not only who they are, but who you once were, the lessons you were taught, and the mistakes you hope never to repeat.…

  • The Weight We Carry… Series – Part 8

    Part 8: The Double Standards We Don’t Talk About Society loves rules, but the rules are rarely fair. From the moment we’re born, gender dictates expectations. Women are expected to be nurturing, strong, patient, and graceful, all at the same time. Men are expected to be stoic, providers, protectors, and resilient; even when the weight…

  • The Weight We Carry… Series – Part 7

    Part 7: Understanding Men, Even When I Wanted to Hate Them or most of my life, I was taught to hate men. My mother’s words echoed in my ears from childhood, warning me of their lies, their cheating, their unpredictability. Growing up in that environment, I absorbed the lessons without question. Men were dangerous, untrustworthy,…

  • The Weight We Carry… Series – Part 6

    Part 6: The Break That Saved Me There comes a moment in life when survival is no longer enough. When the walls you built to protect yourself start to feel like a prison. That moment came for me after my first marriage ended. It wasn’t just a divorce—it was the first time I truly allowed…

  • The Weight We Carry… Series – Part 5

    Part 5: My First Marriage: Comfort, Control, and Misalignment My first marriage wasn’t a fairy tale. Looking back, I can see it clearly for what it was: a relationship built more on comfort and control than on connection or true compatibility. At the time, I thought I was making rational choices. I was trying to…